I’m grateful that I didn’t discover my beloved in the barn hanging but not quite dead. I know what I would have done. I would have sat with her as she died, surrounding her with my love. She knew I wouldn’t waver in supporting her choice. Serving the call of the other’s heart was the […]
Having Someone’s Back Read More »
17 December 2019. Five months. A recent dream. I’m in a commercial airliner. We are approaching a large metropolitan airport. It becomes apparent that this landing is an emergency of some kind. We are entering a corridor bordered on both sides by the kind of big towers used for electric transmission or broadcast outlets.
Safe Landing Right Up My Alley Read More »
Ever watch Penn and Teller? Or the late Ricky Jay? Or any other stellar magician? They amaze us because they do things that defy our mind’s addiction to understand on terms that make sense to us. If asked to define “human nature” in five words or fewer, my candidate would be “The desire for answers.”
The Desire for Answers Read More »
The tsunami of the heart triggered by my beloved’s need to exit this incarnation reminds me how valuable it has been to have spent so much of my life trying to grasp how the universe works. Not that I hold an answer that’s useful for anyone but me. The one I do have
Bowing to the Future Read More »
The car radio was broadcasting an interview with Dr. William Kaelin, a Harvard guy who’d just been awarded this year’s Noble Prize in Medicine. The news raised no eyebrows among those familiar with leading edge medical research. In recent years Dr. Kaelin had received several other forms of recognition that are often precursors to the
The Meaning of Difficult Read More »
When the heart grieves over what it has lost, the spirit rejoices over what it has found. ~Sufi proverb Two months ago my beloved died. The person I was died with her. We were soul playmates for 45 years. I look forward to being able to share stories of her life and how she came
Dreams After Death Read More »
Another mark of depression’s weariness is me sitting in my journaling chair, penning these words into the Moleskine, rather than head out in my pj’s with my camera and search for an image of a stone sculpture in rare repose thanks to the early morning mist. The magic will come again, I rationalize. Though no
But Wait, What Do I See? Read More »
Depression’s insidiousness can include an almost complete obliteration of one’s perception of life as God and nothing else. Maybe more than almost. This is especially unsettling when that has been one’s default orientation for decades. Over the past thirteen months, my beloved’s internal world has become more and more both numb and agitated––empty and overwhelming––despite