“To thine own self be true.” Now that’s useful advice, even if it is impossible to follow. At least it’s impossible for me, because I don’t know who my “own self” is. Fortunately, my lack of understanding doesn’t get in the way of a rewarding life.
I can tell you all sorts of things that my “own self” is not. Names I’ve actually been known to call myself, but not with any conviction that “This is who I am.” It’s more for convenience. Man, Vermonter, American, writer, alcoholic, cancer survivor, Amherst alum, grandfather, builder of stone sculptures, even the king of kale. You catch my drift.
I’m much more than any collection of labels. So are you.
But when it comes to who my “own self” actually is, the best title I can dream up is “manifestation of God.” And that’s kind of cheating, really, because, to me, every speck of existence is a manifestation of God.
The thing is, the answer to “Who am I?” is not a bumper sticker. It’s not even a thought. My True Self is an experience so much bigger than anything I have words for. Whenever I get a tiny energetic glimpses of it, I’m speechless.
Did you know that St. Thomas Aquinas had an energetic glimpse so profound that, as a result, he basically gave up saying anything about anything for the rest of his life? He discovered he had no language equal to his experience. And this was the number one philosopher dude in the Catholic Church.
That’s kind of how I feel about this “own self” I strive to be true to. Which leads me to think that there’s something really cool going on here.
Not knowing who our “own self” is means, duh, we can’t know if we’re being true to it. Therefore, the best we can do is aspire to be true, and to take the most loving action we can conceive of to do so.
The beautiful irony is that, when we do that, we’re zeroing in on what just may be the most meaningful action any human can take: investing all the energy we can in service of a noble aspiration without attachment to results.
Why is that so meaningful? Well, we control how much energy we invest in our life. What we do not control is outcome. A brain surgeon isn’t responsible for their patient’s survival. The surgeon is responsible only for doing everything he or she possibly can so that their patient has the greatest chance of survival. Outcome is always beyond our control.
So, I say who cares who we are? It sure doesn’t matter to me. The question is: are we bringing all the love we can to here and now. That, if I had to guess, is what being true to thine own self really means.
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Sharing my discoveries and welcoming yours is the purpose of this little playground. I hope you’ll add your voice when it feels right.
If you’d like to explore working together, click on Q&A, or visit my other website, CoolMindWarmHeart.com